Birth Warriors

When Adam and Ever were in the Garden of Eden, God told them that they could do anything as long as they did not eat from the forbidden apple tree.

Satan appeared as a snake to Eve and convinced her to take a bite from the apple and then to get her husband to take a bite.

They were seen by God and were cast out of Paradise. They were banished from the Garden of Eden forever.

As a punishment to Eve for having done that forbidden act, God gave her the pains of childbirth.

And wasn't that nice of him.

Religious teachings aside, this is what I was thinking about a lot this weekend. You know, when I was pregnant, I as in Italy studying Italian Renaissance Art. As the group I was with knew I was pregnant, every time we saw the Banishment, the Professor would turn to me and joke that I was going to have to bear the burden of Eve's decision.

I was pretty optimistic about my birth for the entirety of my pregnancy thinking that it could be not as bad as they say it could be. I even read stories online of women whose babies literally fell out of them while they were doing their daily activities. I was sure that was going to be me.

It turns out, that the punishment given to women was a very real one, but it is also a very spiritual one. Any woman that has gone through something of a natural birth will tell you that there is something incredibly magical about giving birth to a baby, especially if you do it without drugs and in water.

I was hoping on that kind of an experience. However, after 48 hours of labor and a whole hell of a lot of pushing, it was clear that I was going to have to bear the burden further, and I was going to have to have a c-section.

I go back and forth on my c-section. Some days it does not bother me and other days it really does bother me. On a really optimistic day, I feel like it was a blessing. You see, if I had just had a perfect birth, I think I would have gone on with my life and I never would have gotten caught up in the sanctity of childbirth. Though this probably would have been fine, I am discovering that a lot of my passion and experience draws on the fact that I endured a trial, a very real and very tough trial.

The problem is that when other people I know have babies, it stirs it all up. When I know of someone having a natural birth, I feel jealous and I feel like a wimp. I wish I could erase the memory of anyone who was involved so that only I would have to remember what a short straw I drew.

Over the weekend, one of my friends had a baby. She ended up having a c-section after a very long trial of labor. On one hand, if she had has such a long trial of labor and managed to have the baby naturally, I was going to feel horrible, like a crazy little wimp because I had to have my baby cut out of me. On the other hand, I did not want to wish a c-section on anyone. In the end, I think my friend is happy with where she ended up with the birth, but I feel for her that she had to endure the pain of being cut into to get the baby out rather than having the baby naturally.

And that brings up the subject of birth warriors. I think there are a lot of birth warriors out there. It is not just the mamas that make it through a trial of labor undrugged (as I didnt'). I think it includes the mamas that have extremely long labors or the mamas that even try giving natural labor a try. My friend this weekend was definitely a birth warrior, and I think that I am to. It is not so much the method of birth in the end, it is the bravery endured by a mama in a very scary situation.

I am looking now at birth plans for the future, and the possibilities are endless. I only hope that I can prove to be as much of a birth warrior as some of the women I have come to know.