Sitting from the vantage that I now have, I don't know how I could have lucked out better in life.
I got to grow up on our ranch in Eastern Oregon, which imparted various morals and work ethics in me that I have been able to use for the rest of my life. I was lucky that my grandmother was so kind and wanted to raise me after my mom died. Though life in Burns had its ups and downs, I am so glad that I grew up there.
My grandma knew what a failure the education system was, and she was willing to help me figure out how to afford to go to Delphi. She is a very strong woman, and even though I am not a great scientist or brilliant engineer, that education was priceless to me. It turned me into the person that I want to be. It was the best possible opportunity I could have gotten. People thought that she was crazy for wanting to send me, but she was brilliant.
After Delphi, I met Jared, and I was lucky enough to catch him permanently in life. He is the most amazing person. I hear of other people having knock-down fights or various problems in their relationships. Though we do our fair share of voice battles, :) they work out fairly easily. He has been battling with colitis for the entire time that I have known him. Sometimes it kicks his butt and sometimes he kicks its butt. Honestly, I don't think he has ever lost. He is a fighter. When we first started dating, he told me that he didn't want to see anyone until he got well. I told him that he could break up with me, but not for that reason. Needless to say, we are still together, and apparently, he appreciates that bold move on my end. Even though it has been up and down, it has been a great pleasure to take care of him. Many of my views and firm beliefs about being a wife and taking care of a family have come about because he has required as much love and care that I could give. I don't mind it one bit. It suits me. In exchange, he is the most loving and understanding person I could possibly hope for. Even when we yell at each other, he is nice to me and gives me the benefit of the doubt. I hope that I have made his life better in the same way he has made my life better.
One thing Jared did give me was the gift of going to the Aegean Center--3 times. That experiences changed my life in many ways. My views on the world have changed and my personal traditions. It was the perfect environment for me to grow as a person, and I really like to believe that I did. I also blossomed as an artist. I am actually making a living at what I do, and it is wonderful.
And lastly, I lucked out by having a baby girl. Daphne has changed things so much, but mostly, I get to play with her. Jared has helped me arrange it so that I get to be the primary care taker, and I get to stay home with her. I couldn't be more thankful about things in life. I do work, but I get to do it with my daughter rather than at her expense. She is blossoming into a wonderful little girl very quickly. I love being a mom, and I love being her mom. It makes me feel good when I leave the room, and she starts to scream until I come back into the room. She smiles when I wake up or when I pick her up after playing with her toys. I think she appreciates me too.
So, yes, I lucked out...I SO lucked out.
Wednesday, October 24, 2007
Tuesday, October 23, 2007
Ghetto Shredder
We had a few boxes of checks that were no longer valid because the account was closed a couple months ago. They needed to be shredded.
I sat down with Daphne on my lap and started to use the shredder. It was making a very ghetto sound and finally died in the middle of me trying to shred. It came to a screeching halt.
This left me with the necessity to shred them all by hand. Daphne helped my chewing on them and sucking on them before I shredded them. I was in a race to shred them all before she ate them all. What a race it was.
I sat down with Daphne on my lap and started to use the shredder. It was making a very ghetto sound and finally died in the middle of me trying to shred. It came to a screeching halt.
This left me with the necessity to shred them all by hand. Daphne helped my chewing on them and sucking on them before I shredded them. I was in a race to shred them all before she ate them all. What a race it was.
First Time Mom
Ok. Not to point out the obvious, but you only get to be a first time mom once. I said that to my friend the other day, and she burst up laughing. I thought she was laughing at me, but she assured me that even though it sounded really simple, it really was a profound thought.
Since Daphne was only a few weeks old, people kept telling me that I need to enjoy her because she is going to grow up quickly and I will have felt like I lost it. And I think that really got to me because I have a complex about it or something now. I hug her all the time, I kiss her all the time, and I appreciate her so much. Jared is pretty laid back, but I am constantly telling him to look at her because she is SOOOOOOOO cute or something like that.
The truth is. I am enjoying her. I enjoy her so much. She likes me so much, almost as much as I like her. I spend every waking and every sleeping moment I can with her. She sleeps on my lap constantly and we play together. We cook dinner together and cut down the blackberry bushes together. We mow the lawn and ride the bike together. She is my new best friend.
Though I do want to have 12 kids, I think that there is something very special about what is going on in my life RIGHT NOW. I pity the people that get pregnant 3 months after their first baby. Not only does it mean that their body is going through a hell of a wringer, it also means that their first baby only got to be the first baby for a very short time.
Daphne is living up being spoiled. A new baby would change everything. I am not going to have more children until I am confident that I will be able to control my attention with both of them so that I can love and work with both of them in the same way that I have worked with Daphne. She gets a lot of attention and gets to spend time with her mom, just as it should be.
I am a first time mom, and I am cherishing it in all the ways that I know how right now. I think I could even spend more time with her. Some moms feel they need a break, but I don't get them. I spend all day and all night with her, and I feel like I could even do more.
I am living in a very special time with my baby right now. I am a first time mom with a baby that gets all my attention. That will never happen again. Though I know that I will love any future children that I will have, I get this special time with my special little girl that I love so much.
Since Daphne was only a few weeks old, people kept telling me that I need to enjoy her because she is going to grow up quickly and I will have felt like I lost it. And I think that really got to me because I have a complex about it or something now. I hug her all the time, I kiss her all the time, and I appreciate her so much. Jared is pretty laid back, but I am constantly telling him to look at her because she is SOOOOOOOO cute or something like that.
The truth is. I am enjoying her. I enjoy her so much. She likes me so much, almost as much as I like her. I spend every waking and every sleeping moment I can with her. She sleeps on my lap constantly and we play together. We cook dinner together and cut down the blackberry bushes together. We mow the lawn and ride the bike together. She is my new best friend.
Though I do want to have 12 kids, I think that there is something very special about what is going on in my life RIGHT NOW. I pity the people that get pregnant 3 months after their first baby. Not only does it mean that their body is going through a hell of a wringer, it also means that their first baby only got to be the first baby for a very short time.
Daphne is living up being spoiled. A new baby would change everything. I am not going to have more children until I am confident that I will be able to control my attention with both of them so that I can love and work with both of them in the same way that I have worked with Daphne. She gets a lot of attention and gets to spend time with her mom, just as it should be.
I am a first time mom, and I am cherishing it in all the ways that I know how right now. I think I could even spend more time with her. Some moms feel they need a break, but I don't get them. I spend all day and all night with her, and I feel like I could even do more.
I am living in a very special time with my baby right now. I am a first time mom with a baby that gets all my attention. That will never happen again. Though I know that I will love any future children that I will have, I get this special time with my special little girl that I love so much.
New York in Christmas
Every year for the past 5 years, I have been wanting to head to New York during the Christmas season. I have never been there, and something about the holiday season in New York is very magical for me, so I decided to do it.
I can go visit my very best friends Melissa and Alex in NH. My friend George has not met my daughter, and he lives right there in Rockaway Beach. My dear friend from Greece Savana goes to school at NYU, I had better not forget her. I want to see the MET and Central Park and Times Square, and and and....
I leave on December 4th, our 4th anniversary. This is right after Daphne's naming ceremony, which will be cool! I will get back on December 17th. Just under 2 weeks. I am very excited!
I managed to book my ticket last night, so it is pretty official.
I can go visit my very best friends Melissa and Alex in NH. My friend George has not met my daughter, and he lives right there in Rockaway Beach. My dear friend from Greece Savana goes to school at NYU, I had better not forget her. I want to see the MET and Central Park and Times Square, and and and....
I leave on December 4th, our 4th anniversary. This is right after Daphne's naming ceremony, which will be cool! I will get back on December 17th. Just under 2 weeks. I am very excited!
I managed to book my ticket last night, so it is pretty official.
Christmas
I have been thinking a lot about Christmas. I thought I would mix it up.
I am sure that I could come up with something that I want for Christmas, I am going to go with my recent theme of saving the world, not buying new, hippyism, etc.
I don't want anything for Christmas. Instead, I would like to donate a goat to Heifer International. The cost--$120. So, if you thought you were going to get me something for Christmas, redirect the money to this.
This seems unselfish of me, but really, it has some purposes. I love the idea of Heifer International, but I have not donated yet myself. This is a great opportunity. If I can't have a goat, than someone that really needs one to sustain himself should get one. I have what I need in life, I have a baby and we are both well fed. I have a great life and a great husband. Some people don't have enough food, and we sometimes have enough. I am passing up my opportunity to have more things to give life to someone who really could use it.
Check out the donations page of Heifer International. Consider doing this yourself. Maybe Christmas could be returned to the spirit of Tiny Tim.
I am sure that I could come up with something that I want for Christmas, I am going to go with my recent theme of saving the world, not buying new, hippyism, etc.
I don't want anything for Christmas. Instead, I would like to donate a goat to Heifer International. The cost--$120. So, if you thought you were going to get me something for Christmas, redirect the money to this.
This seems unselfish of me, but really, it has some purposes. I love the idea of Heifer International, but I have not donated yet myself. This is a great opportunity. If I can't have a goat, than someone that really needs one to sustain himself should get one. I have what I need in life, I have a baby and we are both well fed. I have a great life and a great husband. Some people don't have enough food, and we sometimes have enough. I am passing up my opportunity to have more things to give life to someone who really could use it.
Check out the donations page of Heifer International. Consider doing this yourself. Maybe Christmas could be returned to the spirit of Tiny Tim.
Be Prepared
I am taking a little bit of advice from the boy scouts and I am working on being prepared.
Not that I intend anything to happen to either Jared or I, but I want Daphne to know that we love her and I want to ensure that she is provided for. How do you do that
1.) Take out term life insurance. No matter how much you think you don't need it, you do. If, god forbid, anything were to happen, the money could be seriously used to ensure that the future of my children is provided for. I pay $10 a month for a $250,000 term life policy. It is totally worth it knowing that if it were needed, Daphne would have the resources needed to live well.
2.) Writing a will. We are in the process of writing a will and setting up a trust for our children. It is a rough process, one hard to think about, but I know that the paperwork is done so that it is clear what my wishes are and someone doesn't have to wade through everything trying to figure it out.
NOT that I am intending to go anywhere soon, I just want to be a good boy scout and be prepared so that I can just enjoy the time I have with Daphne.
Not that I intend anything to happen to either Jared or I, but I want Daphne to know that we love her and I want to ensure that she is provided for. How do you do that
1.) Take out term life insurance. No matter how much you think you don't need it, you do. If, god forbid, anything were to happen, the money could be seriously used to ensure that the future of my children is provided for. I pay $10 a month for a $250,000 term life policy. It is totally worth it knowing that if it were needed, Daphne would have the resources needed to live well.
2.) Writing a will. We are in the process of writing a will and setting up a trust for our children. It is a rough process, one hard to think about, but I know that the paperwork is done so that it is clear what my wishes are and someone doesn't have to wade through everything trying to figure it out.
NOT that I am intending to go anywhere soon, I just want to be a good boy scout and be prepared so that I can just enjoy the time I have with Daphne.
What the California Fires Taught Me
Jared and I were talking about the California fires recently. I pray for the people down there that are in risk of losing their homes. I hope things work out for them, yet I know that some have already lost their homes.
Jared and I agreed what a tragedy it is. I can only imagine losing everything you own to a fire. Insurance is nice, but some things can't be bought. As a photographer, one thing that scares me is that the images I have of my personal family could very well go up in smoke. I would have nothing. We do have a fireproof safe, but, if for some reason it were not to work, I would be devastated to not have the images I have taken of my life and especially my little girl.
My solution is simple, I am going to keep back up copies of the photos and DVDs that are important to me personally. The back ups will be in the safe, but they will also be put online as well. That way, I would be able to replace any physical things in my house, and my memories and photos would all be safe. It seriously made me sleep better tonight to have this solution, I just need to get the photos up there now.
Jared and I agreed what a tragedy it is. I can only imagine losing everything you own to a fire. Insurance is nice, but some things can't be bought. As a photographer, one thing that scares me is that the images I have of my personal family could very well go up in smoke. I would have nothing. We do have a fireproof safe, but, if for some reason it were not to work, I would be devastated to not have the images I have taken of my life and especially my little girl.
My solution is simple, I am going to keep back up copies of the photos and DVDs that are important to me personally. The back ups will be in the safe, but they will also be put online as well. That way, I would be able to replace any physical things in my house, and my memories and photos would all be safe. It seriously made me sleep better tonight to have this solution, I just need to get the photos up there now.
Leap Year
Because the Earth takes a little more than 24 hours to spin around the sun, we end up with a little less than a quarter day every year extra. This spare change has been a problem, one that we have to continually keep under control. I wanted to share the calculation with you because I read it recently and was surprised at how complex it was.
From Wikipedia:
A leap year is a year containing one or more extra days in order to keep the calendar year synchronized with the astronomical or seasonal year. For example, February would have 29 days in a leap year instead of the usual 28. Seasons and astronomical events do not repeat at an exact number of full days, so a calendar which had the same number of days in each year would over time drift with respect to the event it was supposed to track. By occasionally inserting an additional day into the year, the drift can be corrected. A year which is not a leap year is called a common year. In fact, the Earth takes slightly under 365 1/4 days to revolve around the Sun.
From Wikipedia:
A leap year is a year containing one or more extra days in order to keep the calendar year synchronized with the astronomical or seasonal year. For example, February would have 29 days in a leap year instead of the usual 28. Seasons and astronomical events do not repeat at an exact number of full days, so a calendar which had the same number of days in each year would over time drift with respect to the event it was supposed to track. By occasionally inserting an additional day into the year, the drift can be corrected. A year which is not a leap year is called a common year. In fact, the Earth takes slightly under 365 1/4 days to revolve around the Sun.
The Gregorian calendar, the current standard calendar in most of the world, adds a 29th day to February in all years evenly divisible by 4, except for centennial years (those ending in -00) which are not evenly divisible by 400. Thus 1600, 2000 and 2400 are leap years but 1700, 1800, 1900, 2100, 2200 and 2300 are not.
The reasoning behind this rule is as follows:
- The Gregorian calendar is designed to keep the vernal equinox on or close to March 21, so that the date of Easter (celebrated on the Sunday after the 14th day of the Moon that falls on or after 21 March) remains correct with respect to the vernal equinox.[1]
- The vernal equinox year is currently about 365.242375 days long.
- The Gregorian leap year rule gives an average year length of 365.2425 days.
This difference of a little over 0.0001 days means that in around 8,000 years, the calendar will be about one day behind where it should be. But in 8,000 years, the length of the vernal equinox year will have changed by an amount which can not be accurately predicted. Therefore, the current Gregorian calendar suffices for practical purposes.
There is a tradition, said to go back to Saint Patrick and Brigid of Kildare in 5th century Ireland, but apparently not attested before the 19th century, whereby women may make marriage proposals only in leap years.
Supposedly (but disputed), in a 1288 law by Queen Margaret of Scotland (then age five and living in Norway), fines were levied if the proposal was refused by the man; compensation ranged from a kiss to £1 to a silk gown, in order to soften the blow.[7] Because men felt that put them at too great a risk, the tradition was in some places tightened to restricting female proposals to 29 February.
Others regard these supposed folk traditions as unhistorical.[8]
In Greece, it is believed that getting married in a leap year is bad luck for the couple. Thus, mainly in the middle of the past century, couples avoided setting a marriage date in a leap year.
Nursing
OH the things I have done while nursing a baby.
Sometimes, I just can't get Jared to watch the baby, and I have things to do, so there are some things that I have had to do while nursing her. Here is a short list (I am proud of some of these).
1.) Sew, yes, on a real sewing machine.
2.) Shop online
3.) Edit wedding photos.
4.) Read the mail
5.) Shampoo the carpets
6.) Put together furniture
7.) Pack up the house (before the move in June)
8.) Slept, yes, I have fallen asleep while nursing
9.) Ate. I can't tell you how many meals, but the number is high.
10.) Fold laundry
11.) Pay bills
12.) Change clothes (including one time when I was swimming)
Places I have nursed her. I have no button at all about nursing in public. Here are some places I have nursed her.
1.) At the public swimming pool
2.) In the bathtub
3.) At a restaurant
4.) In the car
5.) In church
6.) At Delphi
7.) At the grocery store
I am sure that I can think of more in both categories. I will update this post if I do, but she just woke up, and considering that it is almost 4 AM, I should probably go back and hit the hay.
Sometimes, I just can't get Jared to watch the baby, and I have things to do, so there are some things that I have had to do while nursing her. Here is a short list (I am proud of some of these).
1.) Sew, yes, on a real sewing machine.
2.) Shop online
3.) Edit wedding photos.
4.) Read the mail
5.) Shampoo the carpets
6.) Put together furniture
7.) Pack up the house (before the move in June)
8.) Slept, yes, I have fallen asleep while nursing
9.) Ate. I can't tell you how many meals, but the number is high.
10.) Fold laundry
11.) Pay bills
12.) Change clothes (including one time when I was swimming)
Places I have nursed her. I have no button at all about nursing in public. Here are some places I have nursed her.
1.) At the public swimming pool
2.) In the bathtub
3.) At a restaurant
4.) In the car
5.) In church
6.) At Delphi
7.) At the grocery store
I am sure that I can think of more in both categories. I will update this post if I do, but she just woke up, and considering that it is almost 4 AM, I should probably go back and hit the hay.
Morbid, Morbid Nursery Rhymes
I personally don't understand how the nursery rhyme has survived as long as I have. I don't understand how mothers and grandmothers have been able to sing these awful, awful things to children. Have you ever listened to the words of some of the nursery rhymes out there?
I did a little bit of research yesterday, and I was able to conclude that the histories of some of the nursery rhymes out there are a little interesting. There is debate over whether Ring around the Rosies is actually connected to the black plague, but anything that could be connected to the death and morbidity of the plague doesn't need to be sang to my baby or played as a childhood game.
Look at the words of some of these:
I did a little bit of research yesterday, and I was able to conclude that the histories of some of the nursery rhymes out there are a little interesting. There is debate over whether Ring around the Rosies is actually connected to the black plague, but anything that could be connected to the death and morbidity of the plague doesn't need to be sang to my baby or played as a childhood game.
Look at the words of some of these:
Goosey, goosey, gander,
Whither dost thou wander?
Upstairs and downstairs
And in my lady's chamber.
There I met an old man
Who wouldn't say his prayers;
I took him by the left leg,
And threw him down the stairs.
It's raining, it's pouring
The old man is snoring
He went to bed and he bumped his head
And couldn't get up in the morning
Rock-a-bye, baby,
In the tree top.
When the wind blows,
The cradle will rock.
When the bough breaks,
The cradle will fall,
And down will come baby,
Cradle and all.
Peter , Peter , pumpkin-eater,
Had a wife and couldn't keep her;
He put her in a pumpkin shell,
And there he kept her very well.
Sing a song of sixpence a pocket full of rye,
Four and twenty blackbirds baked in a pie.
When the pie was opened the birds began to sing,
Oh wasn't that a dainty dish to set before the king?
The king was in his counting house counting out his money,
The queen was in the parlour eating bread and honey
The maid was in the garden hanging out the clothes,
When down came a blackbird and pecked off her nose!
Jack and Jill went up the hill,
To fetch a pail of water.
Jack fell down,
And broke his crown;
And Jill came tumbling after.
London Bridge bridge is falling down, down
Falling down down, falling down, down
London Bridge bridge is falling down, down
My fair lady.
Take a key key and lock padlock her up,
Lock padlock her up, lock padlock her up,
Take a key key and lock padlock her up,
My fair lady.
Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall.
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
All the king's horses,
And all the king's men,
Couldn't put Humpty together again.
There was an old lady who swallowed a fly,
I don't know why she swallowed a fly.
Perhaps she'll die!
Whither dost thou wander?
Upstairs and downstairs
And in my lady's chamber.
There I met an old man
Who wouldn't say his prayers;
I took him by the left leg,
And threw him down the stairs.
It's raining, it's pouring
The old man is snoring
He went to bed and he bumped his head
And couldn't get up in the morning
Rock-a-bye, baby,
In the tree top.
When the wind blows,
The cradle will rock.
When the bough breaks,
The cradle will fall,
And down will come baby,
Cradle and all.
Peter , Peter , pumpkin-eater,
Had a wife and couldn't keep her;
He put her in a pumpkin shell,
And there he kept her very well.
Sing a song of sixpence a pocket full of rye,
Four and twenty blackbirds baked in a pie.
When the pie was opened the birds began to sing,
Oh wasn't that a dainty dish to set before the king?
The king was in his counting house counting out his money,
The queen was in the parlour eating bread and honey
The maid was in the garden hanging out the clothes,
When down came a blackbird and pecked off her nose!
Jack and Jill went up the hill,
To fetch a pail of water.
Jack fell down,
And broke his crown;
And Jill came tumbling after.
London Bridge bridge is falling down, down
Falling down down, falling down, down
London Bridge bridge is falling down, down
My fair lady.
Take a key key and lock padlock her up,
Lock padlock her up, lock padlock her up,
Take a key key and lock padlock her up,
My fair lady.
Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall.
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
All the king's horses,
And all the king's men,
Couldn't put Humpty together again.
There was an old lady who swallowed a fly,
I don't know why she swallowed a fly.
Perhaps she'll die!
I just thought that you might want to know what you were singing to your children. Death destruction, despair. OH MY! No wonder kids have nightmares.
Mcdonalds Beef
This is a central problem for my family, i.e the price of beef. I have never had a Mcdonalds hamburger in my life, and I plan never to either. Join me for the sake of American cattle ranchers.
I'm sure those of you who aren't in the cattle business don't understand the issues here.
But to those of us who whose living depends on the cattle market, this is frustrating. As far as my family, we didn't eat at McDonald's much (Subway is our choice of fast food), but this will keep us from ever stopping there again, even for a drink.
The original message is from the Texas Cattle Feeders Association. American cattle producers are very passionate about this.
McDonald's claims that there is not enough beef in the USA to support their restaurants. Well, we know that is not so. Our opinion is they are looking to save money at our expense. The sad thing of it is that the people of the USA are the ones who made McDonald's successful in the first place, but we are not good enough to provide beef.
We personally are no longer eating at McDonald's, which I am sure does not make an impact, but if we pass this around maybe there will be an impact felt. Please pass it on
Just to add a note, all Americans that sell cows at a livestock auction barn had to sign a paper stating that we do NOT EVER feed our cows any part of another cow. South Americans are not required to do this as of yet.
McDonald's has announced that they are going to start importing much of their beef from South America . The problem is that South Americans aren't under the same regulations as American beef producers, and the regulations they have are loosely controlled.
They can spray numerous pesticides on their pastures that have been banned here at home because of residues found in the beef.. They can also use various hormones and growth regulators that we can't. The American public needs to be aware of this problem and that they may be putting themselves at risk from now on by eating at good old McDonald's.
American ranchers raise the highest quality beef in the world and this is what Americans deserve to eat. Not beef from countries where quality is loosely controlled. Therefore, I am proposing a boycott of McDonald's until they see the light.
I'm sorry but everything is not always about the bottom line, and when it comes to jeopardizing my family's health, that is where I draw the line.
I am sending this note to about thirty people. If each of you send it to at least ten more (30 x 10 = 300) .. and those 300 send it to at least ten more (300 x 10 = 3,000) .. and so on, by the time the message reaches the sixth generation of people, we will have reached over THREE MILLION consumers!
I'll bet you didn't think you and I had that much potential, did you? Acting together we can make a difference. If this makes sense to you, please pass this message on.
David W. Forrest, Ph.D., PAS, Dipl ACAP Department of Animal Science
Texas A&M University Phone
(979) 845-3560
2471 TA! MU Fax (979) 862-3399 College Station , TX 77843-2471
Email d-forrest@tamu.ed
I'm sure those of you who aren't in the cattle business don't understand the issues here.
But to those of us who whose living depends on the cattle market, this is frustrating. As far as my family, we didn't eat at McDonald's much (Subway is our choice of fast food), but this will keep us from ever stopping there again, even for a drink.
The original message is from the Texas Cattle Feeders Association. American cattle producers are very passionate about this.
McDonald's claims that there is not enough beef in the USA to support their restaurants. Well, we know that is not so. Our opinion is they are looking to save money at our expense. The sad thing of it is that the people of the USA are the ones who made McDonald's successful in the first place, but we are not good enough to provide beef.
We personally are no longer eating at McDonald's, which I am sure does not make an impact, but if we pass this around maybe there will be an impact felt. Please pass it on
Just to add a note, all Americans that sell cows at a livestock auction barn had to sign a paper stating that we do NOT EVER feed our cows any part of another cow. South Americans are not required to do this as of yet.
McDonald's has announced that they are going to start importing much of their beef from South America . The problem is that South Americans aren't under the same regulations as American beef producers, and the regulations they have are loosely controlled.
They can spray numerous pesticides on their pastures that have been banned here at home because of residues found in the beef.. They can also use various hormones and growth regulators that we can't. The American public needs to be aware of this problem and that they may be putting themselves at risk from now on by eating at good old McDonald's.
American ranchers raise the highest quality beef in the world and this is what Americans deserve to eat. Not beef from countries where quality is loosely controlled. Therefore, I am proposing a boycott of McDonald's until they see the light.
I'm sorry but everything is not always about the bottom line, and when it comes to jeopardizing my family's health, that is where I draw the line.
I am sending this note to about thirty people. If each of you send it to at least ten more (30 x 10 = 300) .. and those 300 send it to at least ten more (300 x 10 = 3,000) .. and so on, by the time the message reaches the sixth generation of people, we will have reached over THREE MILLION consumers!
I'll bet you didn't think you and I had that much potential, did you? Acting together we can make a difference. If this makes sense to you, please pass this message on.
David W. Forrest, Ph.D., PAS, Dipl ACAP Department of Animal Science
Texas A&M University Phone
(979) 845-3560
2471 TA! MU Fax (979) 862-3399 College Station , TX 77843-2471
Email d-forrest@tamu.ed
Monday, October 22, 2007
Housework and Yardwork
Daphne is amazing. She had a little charm about her that keeps me fascinated 100% of the time, and I love it.
I am trying to winterize the house so that I can go inside and hibernate and not have to worry about the outside for a little while. Unfortunately, there was a lot to do.
I had to 1.) mow the lawn before the rains really hit, 2.) prune my strawberry bushes that I let grow wild to fill in a bunch pf empty dirt, 3.) prune the other plants in the front, 4.) trim the edges of the lawn, 4.) move my herbs inside (they are much happier now), 5.) move my other starter plants inside, 6.) sweep off the deck, 7.) wash off the dog's deck, 8.) clear out the blackberry bushes, 9.) mix up the compost pile, 10.) clean out the dogs bin and 11.) organize the garage so that we can park in there again.
Rather than waste Jared's time by making him take the baby while I did this, I did it with her strapped to my back. It was pretty amusing actually. She loved it, and I finally got her to fall asleep in her new Ergo, which was SO nice.
I took the garbage out to the curb yesterday, and I was so amazed at how good the house looks. It looks like someone actually lives here! The good part is that my plants all came inside, and I like them so much. It is nice to be surrounded by them when I am working in the kitchen.
With the yard work being such a big success, I decided to try to get some housework done. The biggest project proved to be laundry, so I took all the laundry that was clean and threw it on the bed. Then I put Daphne on the other side of it, and she helped me unfold all the clothes that I had folded. It was so nice to do laundry with her though. There was something magical about spending that time with her. I got 4 loads folded, which was very nice.
We then cleaned 2 bathrooms, 2 bedrooms and the living room. I put her on my back, and she was perfectly happy to just sit there and be the happiest baby on earth. I still have 3 rooms to go to get everything clean, but we are off to a great start!
I am trying to winterize the house so that I can go inside and hibernate and not have to worry about the outside for a little while. Unfortunately, there was a lot to do.
I had to 1.) mow the lawn before the rains really hit, 2.) prune my strawberry bushes that I let grow wild to fill in a bunch pf empty dirt, 3.) prune the other plants in the front, 4.) trim the edges of the lawn, 4.) move my herbs inside (they are much happier now), 5.) move my other starter plants inside, 6.) sweep off the deck, 7.) wash off the dog's deck, 8.) clear out the blackberry bushes, 9.) mix up the compost pile, 10.) clean out the dogs bin and 11.) organize the garage so that we can park in there again.
Rather than waste Jared's time by making him take the baby while I did this, I did it with her strapped to my back. It was pretty amusing actually. She loved it, and I finally got her to fall asleep in her new Ergo, which was SO nice.
I took the garbage out to the curb yesterday, and I was so amazed at how good the house looks. It looks like someone actually lives here! The good part is that my plants all came inside, and I like them so much. It is nice to be surrounded by them when I am working in the kitchen.
With the yard work being such a big success, I decided to try to get some housework done. The biggest project proved to be laundry, so I took all the laundry that was clean and threw it on the bed. Then I put Daphne on the other side of it, and she helped me unfold all the clothes that I had folded. It was so nice to do laundry with her though. There was something magical about spending that time with her. I got 4 loads folded, which was very nice.
We then cleaned 2 bathrooms, 2 bedrooms and the living room. I put her on my back, and she was perfectly happy to just sit there and be the happiest baby on earth. I still have 3 rooms to go to get everything clean, but we are off to a great start!
Alumni Weekend
This past weekend was Alumni Weekend at Delphi. They do it a little different, and they have everyone who went to school there previously come back every year to get information on what the school is up to and network with other graduates and past students. As a big part of the celebration, the alumni that graduated 10 years ago get roasted with a hilarious skit in front of everyone.
We had a lot of fun this year. There were babies, babies, everywhere. Daphne got to meet a lot of my friends that had heard about her, but had not yet seen her in real life. Everyone agreed that she was CUTE!
There were tons of babies, but the funny thing is that Daphne is the oldest. I had no idea that I was leading a HUGE wave of babies. It was like the baby revolution. The other funny thing is that out of 5 babies, only 1 was a boy. I see a big band of girls in the near future that could potentially be lifelong friends. How cool is that?!
We had a lot of fun this year. There were babies, babies, everywhere. Daphne got to meet a lot of my friends that had heard about her, but had not yet seen her in real life. Everyone agreed that she was CUTE!
There were tons of babies, but the funny thing is that Daphne is the oldest. I had no idea that I was leading a HUGE wave of babies. It was like the baby revolution. The other funny thing is that out of 5 babies, only 1 was a boy. I see a big band of girls in the near future that could potentially be lifelong friends. How cool is that?!
DA!!!
Daphne is now starting to find more and more joy in playing by herself. She will sit on the floor with her toys chewing on them and throwing them around. She likes to crawl and also find what kinds of trouble she can get into.
Recently, while playing with herself, she started making anew noise. She started to go Gah, Gah, Gah, just as something to do while playing. There is no better time to exercise your voice, I suppose.
Around that same time, she started to make the noise DA. She only does it when her dad is around and she wants to get his attention. To her great surprise this morning, she said DA! and he looked at her and said hi. She gave him a look like she was SO glad that he knew that she was talking about her. She has been doing nothing all day now but saying DA! DA! DA!!!
It is the cutest thing that I have seen in a while.
Recently, while playing with herself, she started making anew noise. She started to go Gah, Gah, Gah, just as something to do while playing. There is no better time to exercise your voice, I suppose.
Around that same time, she started to make the noise DA. She only does it when her dad is around and she wants to get his attention. To her great surprise this morning, she said DA! and he looked at her and said hi. She gave him a look like she was SO glad that he knew that she was talking about her. She has been doing nothing all day now but saying DA! DA! DA!!!
It is the cutest thing that I have seen in a while.
Sunday, October 21, 2007
So Much to Write About
Every time I do something, I have an automatic instinct to want to blog about it. I have a lot of things in the works right now, so stick with me while I try to write with a very needy daughter trying to also compete for my attention. She wins--A LOT!
Thursday, October 18, 2007
The Best Part of Waking Up
Every morning when Daphne wakes up, I go into her room, jump on her bed and give her a good "GOOD MORNING." She looks at me and smiles really big and than launches her body across the bed to try to get to me. This is the best thing. She recognized me and it happy that I come to get her when she wakes up in the morning. What a darling. I really do look forward to this EVERY DAY, and it IS the best part of the day.
And She Sleeps With Angels
This morning, after a rough night, I rolled over and watched Daphne sleep. She was fussing around a little bit, and was half way between awake and asleep. She did her stretching thing where her hand goes just above her head that is big for her body (as all babies heads are) and she sticks her neck out.
It was cute, and I realized that no matter how mad I get when she wakes up in the middle of the night and wont go back to sleep, I get to sleep with an angel every night, and nothing could be better than that.
It was cute, and I realized that no matter how mad I get when she wakes up in the middle of the night and wont go back to sleep, I get to sleep with an angel every night, and nothing could be better than that.
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
From Miso Soup to Pineapple Juice
I have to tell you that I am downright bad at this whole feeding solid foods thing.
Something about me for the first six months was sure that I just didn't need to be feeding her any solid foods. She was interested in our food and what we were eating, but it was more that she was interested in EVERYTHING and food just seemed to be another thing.
I told her when she was born that she got to drink nothing but milk for the first 6 months and then on her dads birthday that she would get to eat with him.
That didn't happen. She isn't really interested, and I just don't get it. I went to all this trouble to start making baby food. I thought that she needed to eat more because it seemed that she was getting hungry at night, but I must have been wrong.
I am determined not to give her any dairy or any grains. I think it is just wrong. She can get all the dairy she wants from me, but not other animals. Grains are WAY too hard on a little baby, so we are going to start with natures fruits and vegetables.
I should have KNOWN that she wouldn't have wanted to start with fruits when she hit it off more than once with pieces of raw onion that I chopped up for dinner.
So after trying fruit over and over and getting no real good response, I moved on.
We tried pumpkin, and that was OK. After sheer frustration, I decided to try feeding her whatever I was eating as long as it wasn't meat, dairy or grains. And that worked! She had some tomato soup, which worked lovely.
However, the other night, I made miso soup for Jared and I. At the end of the meal, I offered it to Daphne, and she LOVED it. She ate almost a quarter of a bowl of it, and I was impressed.
Thinking I had found something successful, I made some more the next night, and to my great disappointment, she hated it. She wanted my pineapple juice and nothing else.
I have a seriously fickle baby on my hands that is still not seriously interested in eating solid foods JEEZ.
Something about me for the first six months was sure that I just didn't need to be feeding her any solid foods. She was interested in our food and what we were eating, but it was more that she was interested in EVERYTHING and food just seemed to be another thing.
I told her when she was born that she got to drink nothing but milk for the first 6 months and then on her dads birthday that she would get to eat with him.
That didn't happen. She isn't really interested, and I just don't get it. I went to all this trouble to start making baby food. I thought that she needed to eat more because it seemed that she was getting hungry at night, but I must have been wrong.
I am determined not to give her any dairy or any grains. I think it is just wrong. She can get all the dairy she wants from me, but not other animals. Grains are WAY too hard on a little baby, so we are going to start with natures fruits and vegetables.
I should have KNOWN that she wouldn't have wanted to start with fruits when she hit it off more than once with pieces of raw onion that I chopped up for dinner.
So after trying fruit over and over and getting no real good response, I moved on.
We tried pumpkin, and that was OK. After sheer frustration, I decided to try feeding her whatever I was eating as long as it wasn't meat, dairy or grains. And that worked! She had some tomato soup, which worked lovely.
However, the other night, I made miso soup for Jared and I. At the end of the meal, I offered it to Daphne, and she LOVED it. She ate almost a quarter of a bowl of it, and I was impressed.
Thinking I had found something successful, I made some more the next night, and to my great disappointment, she hated it. She wanted my pineapple juice and nothing else.
I have a seriously fickle baby on my hands that is still not seriously interested in eating solid foods JEEZ.
The Competition Game
I am noticing that there is this funny competition/comparison game that happens with new moms and people who surround new moms.
People ALWAYS want to compare babies to other babies. I think it is kind of odd, but apparently, I am the only one. Sometimes, I will get into conversations about Daphne with other people, and they will have to tell me how she compares to other babies they know in height, weight, number of teeth, number of naps, number of poops, number of diapers, number of sold foods eaten, etc.
I think that is a funny phenomenon for many reasons.
1.) All babies truly are individual and unique. My friend has a baby that is 2 weeks younger than Daphne that does not want to stand up or walk yet, but he has 3 teeth. Daphne is standing and trying to walk, but she doesn't have any teeth. Neither of the babies is really "behind", but it is really easy to try to compare them and think that one or the other is behind.
2.) People try to convince you (if they like you) that your baby is ahead of all the other babies. People always ask me how old she is and when I tell them I get the ubiquitous, "Only (blank) months old and she is already talking, walking, babbling, crawling, etc. It is like they are trying to convince me that my baby is better than all the other babies out there, when in fact there can be no comparison each baby is unique and special in their own right.
3.) I feel no need to put my baby on a timetable of compare her to other babies. I just don't, so when people do try to convince me that she is SO ahead developmentally, I always find it kind of odd.
4.) People worry too much. My baby is barely eating solid foods, and she is 7.5 months old. This totally doesn't subscribe to the 6 month timetable, and I have had people indicate that maybe I should do something about that. I am not budging on this one. Daphne will KNOW when she needs to be eating solid foods, and she will indicate to me that she wants more. I KNOW that it will happen.
Most importantly, Daphne is growing, she is still alive, she is thriving and she is beautiful. I am not into the competition game because she is to perfect and unique for me to be spending all my time working about where she is in comparison to every other baby. It just doesn't matter.
People ALWAYS want to compare babies to other babies. I think it is kind of odd, but apparently, I am the only one. Sometimes, I will get into conversations about Daphne with other people, and they will have to tell me how she compares to other babies they know in height, weight, number of teeth, number of naps, number of poops, number of diapers, number of sold foods eaten, etc.
I think that is a funny phenomenon for many reasons.
1.) All babies truly are individual and unique. My friend has a baby that is 2 weeks younger than Daphne that does not want to stand up or walk yet, but he has 3 teeth. Daphne is standing and trying to walk, but she doesn't have any teeth. Neither of the babies is really "behind", but it is really easy to try to compare them and think that one or the other is behind.
2.) People try to convince you (if they like you) that your baby is ahead of all the other babies. People always ask me how old she is and when I tell them I get the ubiquitous, "Only (blank) months old and she is already talking, walking, babbling, crawling, etc. It is like they are trying to convince me that my baby is better than all the other babies out there, when in fact there can be no comparison each baby is unique and special in their own right.
3.) I feel no need to put my baby on a timetable of compare her to other babies. I just don't, so when people do try to convince me that she is SO ahead developmentally, I always find it kind of odd.
4.) People worry too much. My baby is barely eating solid foods, and she is 7.5 months old. This totally doesn't subscribe to the 6 month timetable, and I have had people indicate that maybe I should do something about that. I am not budging on this one. Daphne will KNOW when she needs to be eating solid foods, and she will indicate to me that she wants more. I KNOW that it will happen.
Most importantly, Daphne is growing, she is still alive, she is thriving and she is beautiful. I am not into the competition game because she is to perfect and unique for me to be spending all my time working about where she is in comparison to every other baby. It just doesn't matter.
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
No TeethYet!
When Daphne was 2 months old, she started to drool. All the moms around me swore that because there was such a huge increase in drool that she was going to be teething soon.
As my Pediatrician says (yes I do have one, as out of character for me as that is) any baby that is between the ages of 0 and 16 months is always teething. He is really right.
There have been many times that she has been drooly and fussy and had a fever or a runny nose, and I was SURE that she was going to have teeth pop out, BUT nothing happened.
Part of it is that I just love the toothless smiles. I want to take a photo of her toothless gums, but I haven't gotten around to it yet, so I think she is honoring my wishes.
Developmentally, she is "behind" I guess because she doesn't have teeth, but who cares about time tables. She is perfect and adorable, and that is all that matters for me right now!
I am sure that I will post an update when she does end up getting teeth, but she doesn't have any right now. Stay tuned.
As my Pediatrician says (yes I do have one, as out of character for me as that is) any baby that is between the ages of 0 and 16 months is always teething. He is really right.
There have been many times that she has been drooly and fussy and had a fever or a runny nose, and I was SURE that she was going to have teeth pop out, BUT nothing happened.
Part of it is that I just love the toothless smiles. I want to take a photo of her toothless gums, but I haven't gotten around to it yet, so I think she is honoring my wishes.
Developmentally, she is "behind" I guess because she doesn't have teeth, but who cares about time tables. She is perfect and adorable, and that is all that matters for me right now!
I am sure that I will post an update when she does end up getting teeth, but she doesn't have any right now. Stay tuned.
Friday, October 12, 2007
Naming Ceremony
Daphne is finally getting her naming ceremony!
Daphne is here, and we have moved into our new house, so we would like you to join us in celebrating these two wonderful occasions in our lives. Please come to our naming ceremony at our new house on Saturday, December 1, 2007.
In honor of our recent move, we will have an open house from 2-3pm before the naming ceremony. Come on over and tour our new house and our new offices.
Daphne's ceremony will be at our new house at 3pm. We are doing it potluck style, so if you would like to hang out and have dinner at our house after, bring a dish and enjoy some good ol' fashioned potluck food!
Additionally, all of Chris' photography from the Aegean Center will be on display for the first time outside the European Union. Even her husband hasn't seen the art. So come enjoy the fruits of her 9 months of labor in Italy and Greece.
Our new address is:
512 Madsen Loop
Carlton, Or 97111
Directions are available online at www.google.com/map (Mapquest will not send you to the correct house!)
Please email me or put a comment on this post to let us know that you are coming. I hope to see all of Daphne's good friends (and some of our own) there!
Update: Re: gifts, they are not necessary. Though this is a housewarming party, we are foregoing the gift idea. Bring yourself and we can have some fun. I am not refusing gifts for Daphne, but they are not necessary at all. She likes books a lot, but she has plenty of toys.
Here are the people that have confirmed that they will come:
Daphne Anderson (of course)
Mom and Dad Anderson
Carrie Putterman
Robin Gailunas
James Gailunas
Satori Gailunas
Paige Perkins
Bob Anderson
These people send their best wishes, but will not be able to attend.
Rosemary Didear
Paula Horton
Thursday, October 11, 2007
Processing Times
I don't know if you noticed, but I publish on my blog in waves. I do a slew of text posts and then a slew of videos and then a slew of photos. There IS a reason for my madness.
I only have a limited amount of space on Blogger. My camera and video camera takes up a lot of space, so if I put the full files up online, I would only get to share one or two of them with you.
If I take the time to process them, that is edit them, toss out the bads, work on my favorite ones and then resize them and put them on the web, I can put many many more up.
Processing takes time, not a lot, but some, so I prefer to do it in batches.
So stay with me, I post regularly, just not always in photos.
I only have a limited amount of space on Blogger. My camera and video camera takes up a lot of space, so if I put the full files up online, I would only get to share one or two of them with you.
If I take the time to process them, that is edit them, toss out the bads, work on my favorite ones and then resize them and put them on the web, I can put many many more up.
Processing takes time, not a lot, but some, so I prefer to do it in batches.
So stay with me, I post regularly, just not always in photos.
Videos!!
I wanted to make the formal announcement that I am now putting videos up on my site. It will only happen every so often, but when I put one up, I will put a whole slew of them up. They will be hosted by YouTube, so if you just want to watch my channel there, you can subscribe to www.youtube.com/christibale
Many of you have not seen Daphne recently, or even at all. This is my way to share more of her with you.
Many of you have not seen Daphne recently, or even at all. This is my way to share more of her with you.
Cockroaches are GROSS
When I was in Greece, I lived in an apartment all by myself--well, not with any other humans. I did have cockroaches come by to visit.
I don't know what it is about being pregnant, but they really terrified me to no end. It was WORSE than it is now. Now I just think they are gross, but then I would spend whole nights in my kitchen because I had spotted on in the room earlier in the day.
They have amazing survival potential, and for that, I applaud them, but I am glad there aren't any in Oregon. VERY GLAD.
I don't know what it is about being pregnant, but they really terrified me to no end. It was WORSE than it is now. Now I just think they are gross, but then I would spend whole nights in my kitchen because I had spotted on in the room earlier in the day.
They have amazing survival potential, and for that, I applaud them, but I am glad there aren't any in Oregon. VERY GLAD.
Making People Happy
I have a wide span of people who read my blog, from my family to Jared's family, to my family in Greece and friends across the globe.
It is almost impossible to make EVERYONE happy at the same time.
Apparently, the photos of me nursing Daphne while doing yoga were offensive to my family as well as the video of my nephew because he was naked.
I can understand completely how these things could be considered offensive to some. Rather than get on my soapbox about censorship and accepting people and the natural things they do. I have removed the content from my blog so that I can accommodate all and help all to enjoy my thoughts and photos.
I love you ALL!
It is almost impossible to make EVERYONE happy at the same time.
Apparently, the photos of me nursing Daphne while doing yoga were offensive to my family as well as the video of my nephew because he was naked.
I can understand completely how these things could be considered offensive to some. Rather than get on my soapbox about censorship and accepting people and the natural things they do. I have removed the content from my blog so that I can accommodate all and help all to enjoy my thoughts and photos.
I love you ALL!
Police Department Woes
I have sitting in front of me a traffic warning, yes a traffic warning.
I usually don't have cops look my way, ever, but I guess I made a boo-boo or needed a scare or something because I actually got pulled over the other day.
There I was driving along with Julie and her kids in the car. I came to a pain in the ass light that you has no turn lane, so you are always yielding to the oncoming traffic. After sitting through one green light with no luck, I was coming to the yellow the second time around, and it looked like I could go. There was a car a little up the road that was close, but it had its turn signal on and it had slowed down to turn. However, the jerk decided to go straight instead and sped up almost plowing into me, as I decided to turn.
A cop was 2 cars back. He was nice, and he only gave me a warning. I understood his reasons, but now it makes me totally paranoid I am going to get a ticket because I think given the circumstances again that I would do that same thing. What is wrong with my judgment?
I usually don't have cops look my way, ever, but I guess I made a boo-boo or needed a scare or something because I actually got pulled over the other day.
There I was driving along with Julie and her kids in the car. I came to a pain in the ass light that you has no turn lane, so you are always yielding to the oncoming traffic. After sitting through one green light with no luck, I was coming to the yellow the second time around, and it looked like I could go. There was a car a little up the road that was close, but it had its turn signal on and it had slowed down to turn. However, the jerk decided to go straight instead and sped up almost plowing into me, as I decided to turn.
A cop was 2 cars back. He was nice, and he only gave me a warning. I understood his reasons, but now it makes me totally paranoid I am going to get a ticket because I think given the circumstances again that I would do that same thing. What is wrong with my judgment?
Monday, October 08, 2007
Running
I have always had a lifelong love of running. OK, it is a love-hate relationship really.
When I was in Jr. High, I was on the track team, and I was pretty good. I did a lot of distance running, and I managed to run the 2 mile race, the 1 mile race and the 1/4 mile race in one track meet all while throwing the javelin the shot put and doing the high jump.
Needless to say, I was in better shape back then. When I got to Delphi, I ran during PE class, and it was OK with me, but I didn't love it as much as I had. I think I grew to hate it, and I was anti running for a while until just before I graduated. At that point, I did a health class that I ran every day for, and my love for running actually returned.
Just before I left for Greece the first time, I LOVED running. I think I even posted on my blog about it. I LOVE, LOVE, LOVED it. I went out especially in the rain, and it was wonderful.
And then I quit and never started again.
AND NOW.... I've GOT to lose some baby weight. There has to be something wrong that I still haven't lost any of it yet, and my baby is now 7 months old. What is going on there? I actually went to the doctor to try to figure it out because I am still YES STILL feeling nauseated a lot and even throwing up. And NO, I am not pregnant again. I can assure you.
So I started trying to run. Let me tell you that that is a big love/hate relationship again for me, and we are tending toward hate.
Recovering from a c-section is no easy beans. All of my major core muscles were cut through, so I have to rebuild them from scratch. It is not easy. It is not gratifying. It is definitely not fun. However, I am going to do it.
I am going to start doing Tae-Bo every day to try to get my aerbics back as well as my stomach muscles that I deserve.
When I was in Jr. High, I was on the track team, and I was pretty good. I did a lot of distance running, and I managed to run the 2 mile race, the 1 mile race and the 1/4 mile race in one track meet all while throwing the javelin the shot put and doing the high jump.
Needless to say, I was in better shape back then. When I got to Delphi, I ran during PE class, and it was OK with me, but I didn't love it as much as I had. I think I grew to hate it, and I was anti running for a while until just before I graduated. At that point, I did a health class that I ran every day for, and my love for running actually returned.
Just before I left for Greece the first time, I LOVED running. I think I even posted on my blog about it. I LOVE, LOVE, LOVED it. I went out especially in the rain, and it was wonderful.
And then I quit and never started again.
AND NOW.... I've GOT to lose some baby weight. There has to be something wrong that I still haven't lost any of it yet, and my baby is now 7 months old. What is going on there? I actually went to the doctor to try to figure it out because I am still YES STILL feeling nauseated a lot and even throwing up. And NO, I am not pregnant again. I can assure you.
So I started trying to run. Let me tell you that that is a big love/hate relationship again for me, and we are tending toward hate.
Recovering from a c-section is no easy beans. All of my major core muscles were cut through, so I have to rebuild them from scratch. It is not easy. It is not gratifying. It is definitely not fun. However, I am going to do it.
I am going to start doing Tae-Bo every day to try to get my aerbics back as well as my stomach muscles that I deserve.
Housework Baby
I have been trying to get a lot of housework done lately, and it has been hard with her wanting all my attention. The solution--make her a part of the housework. She likes to fold clothes with me, so I took some photos of it, and I really like them.
Also, while I was trying to fold some clothes at the dryer, she was getting really fussy, so she ended up standing in the washer watching me. It was just the right height. She couldn't cause any trouble, and she was right there with me.
Also, while I was trying to fold some clothes at the dryer, she was getting really fussy, so she ended up standing in the washer watching me. It was just the right height. She couldn't cause any trouble, and she was right there with me.
Sleeping on Mom
Daphne has been a lot more needy lately, which has been a pain because I have had to work a little more lately.
Somewhere along the line, I got the idea to put the rocking chair in front of my desk and work and rock and hold the baby. This solves the problem of her wanting to be with her mom all the time, and it actually makes for more and longer naps. Though this has benefits for me (I get more done), it has been great for her because she has been really tired, and this has been great for her to sleep more.
This is what we look like. I think it is pretty cute.
Somewhere along the line, I got the idea to put the rocking chair in front of my desk and work and rock and hold the baby. This solves the problem of her wanting to be with her mom all the time, and it actually makes for more and longer naps. Though this has benefits for me (I get more done), it has been great for her because she has been really tired, and this has been great for her to sleep more.
This is what we look like. I think it is pretty cute.
Credit Card Baby
If Daphne is fussy and you give her a credit card to play with, she will calm down. I hope this means that she will stay rich and use them wisely in the future.
The first picture is just darn cute. Look at that happy baby.
The second photo has her chewing on her plastic money... yum.
The first picture is just darn cute. Look at that happy baby.
The second photo has her chewing on her plastic money... yum.
Eating a Snappi
What is a Snappi?
A Snappi is a device used to keep a Chinese prefold diaper clothes. Nope, the fond memories your grandmas have of using diaper pins are long gone. A dad somewhere decided that he was tired of sticking his baby or having to manuver the clothes pins to get a diaper on his baby, so he invented the Snappi.
It is like the thing used o keep an Ace Bandage on, only much safer. They are baby magnets when you leave them on the floor, and here she is playing with one.
In case you wanted to check them out as an actual product, go here.
A Snappi is a device used to keep a Chinese prefold diaper clothes. Nope, the fond memories your grandmas have of using diaper pins are long gone. A dad somewhere decided that he was tired of sticking his baby or having to manuver the clothes pins to get a diaper on his baby, so he invented the Snappi.
It is like the thing used o keep an Ace Bandage on, only much safer. They are baby magnets when you leave them on the floor, and here she is playing with one.
In case you wanted to check them out as an actual product, go here.
Mail Walk
Ever since she was born, we have made it a point to go out every day and get the mail, rain or shine. I figured I would document this process. Here is my photo essay just for that purpose.
Here are the boots I put on her when it is cold.
Here she is ready to go.
We are going down the driveway of our house.
Here I am pushing the stroller.
Here she is enjoying the ride.
Here is the stroller in the street. It was a nice day.
Here is the stroller and my shadow.
Thanks for going to get the mail with us. We have fun doing it. It is a boring part of our daily routine from the outside, but we really enjoy it.
Here are the boots I put on her when it is cold.
Here she is ready to go.
We are going down the driveway of our house.
Here I am pushing the stroller.
Here she is enjoying the ride.
Here is the stroller in the street. It was a nice day.
Here is the stroller and my shadow.
Thanks for going to get the mail with us. We have fun doing it. It is a boring part of our daily routine from the outside, but we really enjoy it.
Mommy Play Time
Here are some photos Jared took of me playing airplane with Daphne.
She decided to try to eat me when we were all done!
She decided to try to eat me when we were all done!
Playing with Dad
Here is another photo of Daphne playing with her dad. It was a test of my new camera that I use to take photos of her (so I don't have to put stress and strain on my pro camera).
The photo came out well, and I thought I would show it.
The photo came out well, and I thought I would show it.
Mobile
I am not really into battery operated toys, so I have passed some normal baby things up. One such thing that I have passed up in a mobile. They use them for such short times, and they just aren't necessary, it is not a good use of resources.
I was going to make one myself, but when I was at Ikea in July, I saw this one for only a few bucks. She liked it and I liked it. It is not battery operated. I have it hanging from the cieling. She can watch it for almost an hour sometimes, and I enjoy that she enjoys it.
Yes, no traditional mobile for my baby, this is just another one of those kooky rules I have.
I was going to make one myself, but when I was at Ikea in July, I saw this one for only a few bucks. She liked it and I liked it. It is not battery operated. I have it hanging from the cieling. She can watch it for almost an hour sometimes, and I enjoy that she enjoys it.
Yes, no traditional mobile for my baby, this is just another one of those kooky rules I have.
Let Me Up Mom
Daphne has seriously taken to crawling around and standing on anything that she possibly can. When she is on the floor and I am sitting in a chair, she will do everything in her power to crawl over to me and then try to stand up. Here is is looking innocent, or is that innocence? Could you resist a face like that?
Grandpa Visits Again
Grandpa was here last weekend, which was a nice surprise.
He likes to see Daphne and play with her. Here he is playing with her. I think these are sweet images.
He likes to see Daphne and play with her. Here he is playing with her. I think these are sweet images.
Robeez
I love Robeez shoes. They are the only shoes that she can keep on her feet. They are great looking and they keep her warm. Here she is in two different pairs. I love the booties, they are just adorable.
Daddy Peek-a-Boo
This is Daphne standing on the edge of the tub while her daddy plays peek-a-boo with her.
Mismatched Daphne
This is an outfit that I put Daphne is that is totally mismatched. It was really cute and pretty funny too.
Daphne's Toy Overboard
Daphne has a funny habit of chewing on her chair after she throws a toy down from the table. I just had to get it on camera.
Baby Carriers are Like Shoes
This is an article that I found recently while I was buying a new Ergo baby carrier online. It rang especially true to me, so I thought I would share it with you.
This article is credited to the owner of SoBeBabies.com
At her request, I have only posted part of the article here. Click here if you want to read the whole thing.
"Why the heck is everyone trying to solve all your babywearing needs with one baby carrier when you have five pairs of shoes? Okay, now, ladies, stop laughing. We all know you have just a few more than that stashed away. Shhh, I won’t tell.
So you did your research and plunked down the big bucks for a baby carrier, and, at first, you were happy. Your back and neck felt better and you were all set. But then, you realized, this well-researched purchase did not suit all your needs.
Well duh! Are you gonna wear your snow boots to the beach? Or your flip flops to a business meeting? The answer is usually No!, although one person actually did show up to my wedding with Tevas, but that’s a whole other story!
Here’s the thing. For most of us adults over a certain age, we have figured out that shoes are not a place to skimp. A shoe gets a lot of viewing time and can make or break an outfit, and further, it can make or break your back! Shoes are not a place to skimp because they are about both style and comfort.
Baby carriers are the same! Let me give you a few examples.
1. You got yourself an Ergo and you have been love, love, loving it. It is so much more comfy than the front pack infant thingy you had when your little angel was little which, frankly, broke your upper back and strained your neck. But you’re going to a wedding and you know that Ergo is going to look out of place there, so you are reduced to holding your sweet little baby. Man, you forgot how tiring that was! And you realize your baby can’t nap anywhere because of all the commotion and fussing over him. How convenient it would be if he could be nestled up against you and you could get on with the party.
Introducing: The Dressy Baby Carrier! Yep, there are gorgeous silk slings that can escort you and your little into a wedding in total style!
2. You bought yourself a pouch and it is so simple to use and fine for quick stints. But you are going to Italy and the sidewalks are not stroller friendly. You know you will be walking a lot and your toddler is not the type to keep up. How about a gorgeous Beco? You can pop your baby on your front or back when she’s pooped (as in tired). When you are not using it, you can roll it up into a snug little waist pouch.
3. The Beco was working great but now your darling angel has gotten to that age where he has got to learn to crawl and walk. The up-down-up-down is not working for you. After forking out all that money and only getting a few months usage, you fear you’ve made a poor purchase. Fear not! The Beco or other structured baby carrier is still great for some situations: nursing or sleepy/sleeping baby, and it will come back into its own once your angel has mastered this stage and you will go on to use it for years to come, I promise. But meanwhile, how to deal with this situation? You need something with poppability. A pouch would be great! Plus, when you are baby-less, it packs up small so you can stuff it into your bag.
4. You are at the mall with the stroller and were not intending on babywearing at all. Your little angel has other ideas and you wind up shuffling along, baby on hip, pushing your stroller with the other hand, secretly feeling rather miserable. You dig into your diaper bag, hoping beyond hope. Ahah! You had the foresight to stuff a pouch in there! It’s hiding in a corner but you deftly dig it out, pop it on, and now you can push that package-laden stroller with both hands and a straight back. Whew! Babywearing saves the day! Happy again, you are able to be kinder to your sweet little angel and sneak in a quick kiss on the head.
5. You are totally happy with your sling and always have been. But your husband balks at it and simply refuses to wear it. Your baby is now 9 months old and getting kinda heavy and you are tired of feeling the martyr. In a last-ditch effort to save your marriage, you discuss getting an Ergo and he agrees. Next thing you know, it was all his idea and the Ergo is his baby carrier! You sagely keep your trap shut and wave good bye as he saunters off smugly to the park with baby on his back."
This article is credited to the owner of SoBeBabies.com
At her request, I have only posted part of the article here. Click here if you want to read the whole thing.
"Why the heck is everyone trying to solve all your babywearing needs with one baby carrier when you have five pairs of shoes? Okay, now, ladies, stop laughing. We all know you have just a few more than that stashed away. Shhh, I won’t tell.
So you did your research and plunked down the big bucks for a baby carrier, and, at first, you were happy. Your back and neck felt better and you were all set. But then, you realized, this well-researched purchase did not suit all your needs.
Well duh! Are you gonna wear your snow boots to the beach? Or your flip flops to a business meeting? The answer is usually No!, although one person actually did show up to my wedding with Tevas, but that’s a whole other story!
Here’s the thing. For most of us adults over a certain age, we have figured out that shoes are not a place to skimp. A shoe gets a lot of viewing time and can make or break an outfit, and further, it can make or break your back! Shoes are not a place to skimp because they are about both style and comfort.
Baby carriers are the same! Let me give you a few examples.
1. You got yourself an Ergo and you have been love, love, loving it. It is so much more comfy than the front pack infant thingy you had when your little angel was little which, frankly, broke your upper back and strained your neck. But you’re going to a wedding and you know that Ergo is going to look out of place there, so you are reduced to holding your sweet little baby. Man, you forgot how tiring that was! And you realize your baby can’t nap anywhere because of all the commotion and fussing over him. How convenient it would be if he could be nestled up against you and you could get on with the party.
Introducing: The Dressy Baby Carrier! Yep, there are gorgeous silk slings that can escort you and your little into a wedding in total style!
2. You bought yourself a pouch and it is so simple to use and fine for quick stints. But you are going to Italy and the sidewalks are not stroller friendly. You know you will be walking a lot and your toddler is not the type to keep up. How about a gorgeous Beco? You can pop your baby on your front or back when she’s pooped (as in tired). When you are not using it, you can roll it up into a snug little waist pouch.
3. The Beco was working great but now your darling angel has gotten to that age where he has got to learn to crawl and walk. The up-down-up-down is not working for you. After forking out all that money and only getting a few months usage, you fear you’ve made a poor purchase. Fear not! The Beco or other structured baby carrier is still great for some situations: nursing or sleepy/sleeping baby, and it will come back into its own once your angel has mastered this stage and you will go on to use it for years to come, I promise. But meanwhile, how to deal with this situation? You need something with poppability. A pouch would be great! Plus, when you are baby-less, it packs up small so you can stuff it into your bag.
4. You are at the mall with the stroller and were not intending on babywearing at all. Your little angel has other ideas and you wind up shuffling along, baby on hip, pushing your stroller with the other hand, secretly feeling rather miserable. You dig into your diaper bag, hoping beyond hope. Ahah! You had the foresight to stuff a pouch in there! It’s hiding in a corner but you deftly dig it out, pop it on, and now you can push that package-laden stroller with both hands and a straight back. Whew! Babywearing saves the day! Happy again, you are able to be kinder to your sweet little angel and sneak in a quick kiss on the head.
5. You are totally happy with your sling and always have been. But your husband balks at it and simply refuses to wear it. Your baby is now 9 months old and getting kinda heavy and you are tired of feeling the martyr. In a last-ditch effort to save your marriage, you discuss getting an Ergo and he agrees. Next thing you know, it was all his idea and the Ergo is his baby carrier! You sagely keep your trap shut and wave good bye as he saunters off smugly to the park with baby on his back."
Breastfeeding Mom Gets Rights
 MSNBC.com |
Breast-feeding mom wins court victory
Decision clears way for extra breaks for Harvard student during M.D. test
The Associated Press
Updated: 11:54 a.m. PT Oct 5, 2007
BOSTON - An appeals court cleared the way Friday for a Harvard student to receive extra break time during a lengthy medical licensing exam so she can pump breast milk for her infant daughter.
The state Appeals Court refused to overturn a decision issued by a single justice of the court last week allowing Sophie Currier, 33, an extra 60 minutes of break time.
Currier is scheduled to take the nine-hour exam over two days next week, but the National Board of Medical Examiners planned to appeal to the state Supreme Judicial Court, said the board's attorney, Joseph Savage Jr.
A justice of the Judicial Court declined to hear the case last week, saying the board had to first go to the appeals court.
Currier sued after the national board said she could have only the standard 45 minutes of break time.
'Equal footing'
Last week, Judge Gary Katzmann of the Appeals Court ruled in favor of Currier, saying she needs the extra break time to pump breast milk to feed her 5-month-old baby. Katzmann said if she didn't get the extra time, she would not be on "equal footing" with men and non-lactating women who take the test.
Ignoring the need to pump could cause her significant pain, Katzmann said.
The licensing board appealed Katzmann's ruling to the full, three-judge panel of the appeals court. On Friday, the full court refused to overturn Katzmann's decision.
The court said it based its decision on whether Katzmann abused his discretion or made a clear error of law. The court said it found neither. It did not rule on the merits of the case.
The board, a Philadelphia-based nonprofit corporation, is responsible for administering the test used by boards of medicine across the country to license physicians. It has said it must be consistent in the amount of break time given to all test-takers and that other nursing mothers who have taken the exam found 45 minutes sufficient.
"Our overriding concerns are fairness to all examinees and the integrity of the exam, which serves as an important gateway to medical practice," Savage said. "Our position remains that the exam's sponsors have in no way violated Ms. Currier's rights."
Lauren Stiller Rikleen, one of Currier's attorneys, said she was "amazed" the board would continue to fight Currier's bid for extra break time.
"The test time doesn't change. We're just talking about whether she gets additional break time to express her milk," she said. "This is not about an opportunity that somehow affords any advantage."
Currier already has received special accommodations under the Americans with Disabilities Act for dyslexia and attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, including permission to take the test over two days instead of one. The board also offered her a separate testing room where she can express milk during the test or during break time, and the option to leave the test center to breast-feed during break times.
Currier has finished a joint M.D.-Ph.D. program at Harvard University while having two babies in the past two years. She has been offered a residency in clinical pathology at Massachusetts General Hospital beginning in November but cannot accept it unless she passes the test. Her goal is a career in medical research.
She took the exam in April when she was 8 1/2 months pregnant, but failed by a few points.
Copyright 2007 The Associated Press. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.
URL: http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21150811/
Gazoo Girl--VIDEO
I brought home a gazoo from a wedding a month or two ago. Daphne was very fascinated by it when I showed her how to use it, and she eventually got really good at it. Here is one example of how she uses her gazoo.
Daphne Play--VIDEO
This is a video of Daphne and her daddy before breakfast one day. She is just adorable sometimes.
Sunday, October 07, 2007
Daphne Standing--VIDEO
Daphne can pull herself up to standing. She is very good at it. Her dad's desk has a bar along the bottom part that she likes to crawl over to and stand up on.
Panhandle Eli--VIDEO
This is my nephew Eli. He is very smart. This video is proof of my earlier post about Oklahoma having a panhandle.
Daphne Plays Peek-a-boo--VIDEO
Daphne really likes to play peek a boo. Here we are playing her favorite game. What a ham.
Stroller Pusher--VIDEO
After she mastered the art of crawling, she quickly moved on to the art of standing, as is evidenced by her here pushing her stroller with only one hand.
Mom Play Time--VIDEO
This is Daphne playing with her mom and then attempting to play with the camera. She is very cute.
Baby Vampire--VIDEO
Daphne thinks that any skin is good to nurse on sometimes. Here is one such example. She is too funny.
Letter to Midwife
This is the letter that I recently sent to a midwife that has been taking good emotional care of me:
And yes, I did meet with Esme on Tuesday. It was interesting for me.
I was so ill when I was pregnant, and then I had the c-section. I was going through a "miserable" time when I was pregnant, and it was interesting for me to be back at the birth center when things were relatively normal. It made me realize how fond my memories of the birth center are despite the fact that I was "miserable" the whole time, and it inspired me to start thinking about having more babies. Somehow being back at the birth center just made me believe that it was possible for me to make it.
Esme gave me some good insight into the things that she could. She answered some of the questions that had been floating around and assured me that some of the "unanswered" will never be answered and that I should find peace with that. I was not at all upset with her, but meeting with her made me realize how competent of a midwife that she is and how the events that led up to the c-section were really all my decisions that were under my complete control. I need a more educated and real look at birth the next time and not just a faint hope that the birth would be better than the awful pregnancy that I had. I also need to make sure that the proper people are present and that I have the strength and integrity to butt my opinion in when I feel that something is not right.
I don't know how to not feel like crying or that I had lost something every time to consider her birth. I think that is a natural thing to go through. I now feel like I have some closure on the subject and have been able to put the responsibility for what happened back on my shoulders completely, which is incredibly comforting and empowering.
And, I guess I know how bad it can be.
I want to have more children, many more if I can convince my husband of it. Perhaps the energy I have should be put into creating a better birth future for me. I want to get educated, and I think I need to mix it up a little.
I am now strongly interested in having a birth at home. In my own home without the worries of the outside world or the feeling that there is a "time" that needs to be met to go somewhere. There can be a lot of excitement about that personally and for the family that surrounds you. I want my next birth to be my husband, my daughter, my midwife and me at home with the phones off and a do not disturb sign on the door. We can call people after everything is over while we sit in bed as a family together. I guess this is my dream. A home VBAC.
And you, you are truly a loving and inspiring a midwife. Where have you been all my life? The little bits that I have talked to you here and there have given me confidence. I really, really, really hope that maybe I can convince you to make an appearance as a star in my next home VBAC dream.
Thanks!
Best,
Christine
And yes, I did meet with Esme on Tuesday. It was interesting for me.
I was so ill when I was pregnant, and then I had the c-section. I was going through a "miserable" time when I was pregnant, and it was interesting for me to be back at the birth center when things were relatively normal. It made me realize how fond my memories of the birth center are despite the fact that I was "miserable" the whole time, and it inspired me to start thinking about having more babies. Somehow being back at the birth center just made me believe that it was possible for me to make it.
Esme gave me some good insight into the things that she could. She answered some of the questions that had been floating around and assured me that some of the "unanswered" will never be answered and that I should find peace with that. I was not at all upset with her, but meeting with her made me realize how competent of a midwife that she is and how the events that led up to the c-section were really all my decisions that were under my complete control. I need a more educated and real look at birth the next time and not just a faint hope that the birth would be better than the awful pregnancy that I had. I also need to make sure that the proper people are present and that I have the strength and integrity to butt my opinion in when I feel that something is not right.
I don't know how to not feel like crying or that I had lost something every time to consider her birth. I think that is a natural thing to go through. I now feel like I have some closure on the subject and have been able to put the responsibility for what happened back on my shoulders completely, which is incredibly comforting and empowering.
And, I guess I know how bad it can be.
I want to have more children, many more if I can convince my husband of it. Perhaps the energy I have should be put into creating a better birth future for me. I want to get educated, and I think I need to mix it up a little.
I am now strongly interested in having a birth at home. In my own home without the worries of the outside world or the feeling that there is a "time" that needs to be met to go somewhere. There can be a lot of excitement about that personally and for the family that surrounds you. I want my next birth to be my husband, my daughter, my midwife and me at home with the phones off and a do not disturb sign on the door. We can call people after everything is over while we sit in bed as a family together. I guess this is my dream. A home VBAC.
And you, you are truly a loving and inspiring a midwife. Where have you been all my life? The little bits that I have talked to you here and there have given me confidence. I really, really, really hope that maybe I can convince you to make an appearance as a star in my next home VBAC dream.
Thanks!
Best,
Christine
More C-Section Stuff
I am a part of a group called ICAN. I joined the group to help heal from my unnecessary c-section and to gain perspective so that I might be able to prevent something like this from happening in the future to me and to other women that I know and love.
It has been a hard road for me. Though my body may be finally healing, my spirit is definitely still grappling with the idea that the c-section that I had may not have been necessary at all and that I underwent a major surgery because I was selfishly tired.
My baby is wonderful and healthy, but I ask that you take into consideration the fact that this birth was extremely traumatic for me, and that I am still working on trying to figure out why and how I ended up on that table with my arms held down and sheet over my head as they cut my baby out of me because I failed to give birth the way I was meant to.
Here is another woman in ICAN's perspective on it:
"You should be grateful---after all, you've got a healthy baby."
How many times have we heard those words? How many times have we said them? It seems so obvious, you wanted a child and now you have a healthy child. You are alive to enjoy that child.
You should be grateful. Right?
That phrase (or the similar, "All that matters is a healthy baby") did more damage to me than anything else said to me after my cesarean section. Because on the face of it, it seems so true. My husband and I had struggled with infertility for several years. My pregnancy came after at least 2 miscarriages and drugs to make me ovulate and then to maintain the pregnancy. I had beautiful twin boys. Why was I so upset? Wasn't I grateful? They were apparently healthy and so was I, if you discount the physical devastation of major abdominal surgery on top of the exhaustion taking care of newborn twins brings with it. My recovery was, after all, uncomplicated by medical standards. Physically, I was healing well. Wasn't I grateful?
So many people said it to me, I started to wonder. People I trusted, people I respected, people I loved. Women that had cesarean sections for their children and trumped the advantages of it. Maybe I wasn't grateful for my babies? Maybe I didn't love my babies as much as I should or as much as other mothers did? Maybe I was being selfish and petty to be so upset about the birth and not blissfully happy with my babies---after all, other women seemed to "get over it" so quickly---so quickly in fact that I had to wonder if I was really crazy to think there was anything to "get over." What was the big deal?
Part of the problem was that I actually didn't feel overwhelmingly grateful, nor did I feel overwhelmed with love for my boys. I knew that if anyone threatened them in any way that I'd do anything to protect them. I'd already proven that in negotiating a less traumatic cesarean than they would have normally experienced. I could protect my children but I didn't feel a lot about them. I was depressed. So for several months I wasn't feeling much of anything. It wasn't hard to believe that I wasn't grateful enough, that I didn't love them like I should. But I still had to wonder, even as the depression lifted, why hadn't I 'gotten over it?' What was wrong with me?
Then I began to realize how evil it is to tell a woman who's experienced a physically or emotionally traumatic birth that she should be grateful because when you say that, she hears that she isn't grateful enough for the precious baby she's been given. And that cuts to the quick. She may already be wondering what was wrong with her that she couldn't have a normal birth and now you've told her that she doesn't love her child enough. It is evil to say, "All that matters is a healthy baby," because you are saying that her pain, her damage, doesn't matter. You are telling her that not only is her body broken, but so is her mind. That if she is physically healthy, that's all that matters, and to be concerned with anything else is somehow wrong. That the means to the end doesn't matter, she is expendable.
The truth is a woman can be absolutely grateful and full of passionate mother love for her child and be enraged by how that child came into the world. Hating the birth, hating what happened in that cold impersonal operating room or delivery room has nothing to do with the child. It is possible to be both full of rage and full of love. When that rage is turned inward, a woman is depressed, and likely to believe you when she hears you tell her she's ungrateful and unloving toward her child. And if that rage turns back outward, it will spill over to you, because you told her a lie and she believed it because she trusted you. If that rage stays hidden, it will fester, and eventually there will be a place in that woman's heart where she no longer goes, because it just hurts too much and makes no sense. Good mothers just don't have those feelings, and she's already afraid she isn't a good enough mother. And so she loses something precious, and so do we all.
I discovered that there are a lot of women out there who hated the birth of their child; women who had bad surgeries, women who had good surgeries, rarely women who had necessary surgeries, women who didn't have surgery at all but did have horrible things done to them in the name of birth. I'm not the only one. There is a vast hidden ocean of pain in women who've had horrible births but do love their babies and continue to wonder, "What is wrong with me? If I just loved my baby enough, I wouldn't feel this way."
I was freed by the knowledge that there is nothing wrong with me! I underwent the surgical removal of my children from my body---a procedure that has nothing to do with birth, that completely circumvents what my woman's body is made to do. If it felt like an assault, then it was an assault, a very sexual assault. And if I'm not upset about being assaulted, then there really is something wrong with me. And that nothing that was done to me has the power to keep me from loving my children with passionate mother love.
I am grateful, grateful beyond words for the blessing of my children. They are miracles. The day they were taken out of me was one of the worst days of my life. Yet I am grateful for them, though not for what was done to me. My physical body might have recovered well enough to be called 'healthy' but my spirit was deeply wounded and then neglected. I was not healthy. I know my children suffered because of that. I have a lot to be grateful for but not for their birth, never for their birth. Understanding and accepting that makes me truly healthy. Admitting the horror of their birth frames the love I have for them in a way that astonishes me----amazed at what I went through because of my love for them, I now know I really would die for them if needed.
Now, when you tell me that I should be grateful, I realize that you are showing me how frightened you are. That you are afraid to look at my pain. That you are afraid to admit that maybe I have good reason to be angry, that maybe women are truly assaulted in the name of birth. You are telling me that it's okay for women to have birth ripped from them, that it isn't acceptable to look for a better way or to mourn what was lost. I know you now. You may not know yourself, but I do. And I pity you.
It has been a hard road for me. Though my body may be finally healing, my spirit is definitely still grappling with the idea that the c-section that I had may not have been necessary at all and that I underwent a major surgery because I was selfishly tired.
My baby is wonderful and healthy, but I ask that you take into consideration the fact that this birth was extremely traumatic for me, and that I am still working on trying to figure out why and how I ended up on that table with my arms held down and sheet over my head as they cut my baby out of me because I failed to give birth the way I was meant to.
Here is another woman in ICAN's perspective on it:
"You should be grateful---after all, you've got a healthy baby."
How many times have we heard those words? How many times have we said them? It seems so obvious, you wanted a child and now you have a healthy child. You are alive to enjoy that child.
You should be grateful. Right?
That phrase (or the similar, "All that matters is a healthy baby") did more damage to me than anything else said to me after my cesarean section. Because on the face of it, it seems so true. My husband and I had struggled with infertility for several years. My pregnancy came after at least 2 miscarriages and drugs to make me ovulate and then to maintain the pregnancy. I had beautiful twin boys. Why was I so upset? Wasn't I grateful? They were apparently healthy and so was I, if you discount the physical devastation of major abdominal surgery on top of the exhaustion taking care of newborn twins brings with it. My recovery was, after all, uncomplicated by medical standards. Physically, I was healing well. Wasn't I grateful?
So many people said it to me, I started to wonder. People I trusted, people I respected, people I loved. Women that had cesarean sections for their children and trumped the advantages of it. Maybe I wasn't grateful for my babies? Maybe I didn't love my babies as much as I should or as much as other mothers did? Maybe I was being selfish and petty to be so upset about the birth and not blissfully happy with my babies---after all, other women seemed to "get over it" so quickly---so quickly in fact that I had to wonder if I was really crazy to think there was anything to "get over." What was the big deal?
Part of the problem was that I actually didn't feel overwhelmingly grateful, nor did I feel overwhelmed with love for my boys. I knew that if anyone threatened them in any way that I'd do anything to protect them. I'd already proven that in negotiating a less traumatic cesarean than they would have normally experienced. I could protect my children but I didn't feel a lot about them. I was depressed. So for several months I wasn't feeling much of anything. It wasn't hard to believe that I wasn't grateful enough, that I didn't love them like I should. But I still had to wonder, even as the depression lifted, why hadn't I 'gotten over it?' What was wrong with me?
Then I began to realize how evil it is to tell a woman who's experienced a physically or emotionally traumatic birth that she should be grateful because when you say that, she hears that she isn't grateful enough for the precious baby she's been given. And that cuts to the quick. She may already be wondering what was wrong with her that she couldn't have a normal birth and now you've told her that she doesn't love her child enough. It is evil to say, "All that matters is a healthy baby," because you are saying that her pain, her damage, doesn't matter. You are telling her that not only is her body broken, but so is her mind. That if she is physically healthy, that's all that matters, and to be concerned with anything else is somehow wrong. That the means to the end doesn't matter, she is expendable.
The truth is a woman can be absolutely grateful and full of passionate mother love for her child and be enraged by how that child came into the world. Hating the birth, hating what happened in that cold impersonal operating room or delivery room has nothing to do with the child. It is possible to be both full of rage and full of love. When that rage is turned inward, a woman is depressed, and likely to believe you when she hears you tell her she's ungrateful and unloving toward her child. And if that rage turns back outward, it will spill over to you, because you told her a lie and she believed it because she trusted you. If that rage stays hidden, it will fester, and eventually there will be a place in that woman's heart where she no longer goes, because it just hurts too much and makes no sense. Good mothers just don't have those feelings, and she's already afraid she isn't a good enough mother. And so she loses something precious, and so do we all.
I discovered that there are a lot of women out there who hated the birth of their child; women who had bad surgeries, women who had good surgeries, rarely women who had necessary surgeries, women who didn't have surgery at all but did have horrible things done to them in the name of birth. I'm not the only one. There is a vast hidden ocean of pain in women who've had horrible births but do love their babies and continue to wonder, "What is wrong with me? If I just loved my baby enough, I wouldn't feel this way."
I was freed by the knowledge that there is nothing wrong with me! I underwent the surgical removal of my children from my body---a procedure that has nothing to do with birth, that completely circumvents what my woman's body is made to do. If it felt like an assault, then it was an assault, a very sexual assault. And if I'm not upset about being assaulted, then there really is something wrong with me. And that nothing that was done to me has the power to keep me from loving my children with passionate mother love.
I am grateful, grateful beyond words for the blessing of my children. They are miracles. The day they were taken out of me was one of the worst days of my life. Yet I am grateful for them, though not for what was done to me. My physical body might have recovered well enough to be called 'healthy' but my spirit was deeply wounded and then neglected. I was not healthy. I know my children suffered because of that. I have a lot to be grateful for but not for their birth, never for their birth. Understanding and accepting that makes me truly healthy. Admitting the horror of their birth frames the love I have for them in a way that astonishes me----amazed at what I went through because of my love for them, I now know I really would die for them if needed.
Now, when you tell me that I should be grateful, I realize that you are showing me how frightened you are. That you are afraid to look at my pain. That you are afraid to admit that maybe I have good reason to be angry, that maybe women are truly assaulted in the name of birth. You are telling me that it's okay for women to have birth ripped from them, that it isn't acceptable to look for a better way or to mourn what was lost. I know you now. You may not know yourself, but I do. And I pity you.
Saturday, October 06, 2007
Cute, Cute, Cute!!!!!--VIDEO
My friend made this video in response to the video of Daphne crawling.
Thanks, it made my, Jared and Daphne's morning!!!!
Thanks, it made my, Jared and Daphne's morning!!!!
Tuesday, October 02, 2007
Parenting Things
I guess I am into attachment parenting. That is the kind of parenting where you wear your baby in a sling and sleep with them and breastfeed them and do all the things people say are just coddling the baby unnecessarily. I like it. Babies need their moms. It is nice to be needed, but it is even nicer to be able to give a baby the things that you know it needs. I read in a book recently that babies cry around an hour a day at the minimum. I think that this is much, much less for my little baby. She is so happy all the time when her mom is around.
Recently, she has been teething and extra needy, and when she is in bed, she has to nurse or be right next to me, and I have been getting less and less sleep.
After many, many solutions, I am at a standstill.
I've just tried the cry it out method. She is crying right now. It may work for some people, but I am going to figure out what my child needs to sleep peacefully rather than put her down because I have another agenda.
Here I come Daphne.
Recently, she has been teething and extra needy, and when she is in bed, she has to nurse or be right next to me, and I have been getting less and less sleep.
After many, many solutions, I am at a standstill.
I've just tried the cry it out method. She is crying right now. It may work for some people, but I am going to figure out what my child needs to sleep peacefully rather than put her down because I have another agenda.
Here I come Daphne.
Baby in Bouncy Chair--VIDEO
This is Daphne hanging out in her bouncy chair that we fondly call the spaceship. She had been using it for months, but she just found out how to make it bounce really, really high. Too Funny.
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